Who's Life is it Anyway?

Whose life is it anyway? I often ask myself that same question. Why do we burden ourselves with more than our share of responsibility? No one asked us to do it, no one put a gun to our head and forced us to do it, we volunteered! Why?

We thought we could do it and we really wanted to. But when we finally squeezed out the time and energy to do the good deed, we were spent, frustrated, angry and resentful at ourselves because we didn’t have the foresight to just say “NO” and feel good about it.

Am I weak? Am I not a caring human being? If I say NO I might lose a friendship or their trust and respect. Maybe they won’t be there for me if I need them. Our internal dialogue can be our own worst enemy.

Developing a strong relationship with your partner, a nurturing relationship with friends, a loving relationship with your children, and a healthy relationship with yourself all takes time and plenty of energy. The latter is usually the least priority, but it should be first and foremost on your list.

Yes, it’s a wonderful feeling and truly rewarding to help those close to us fulfill their dreams and desires in the journey of life, but at whose expense?

Lack of self-worth, self-respect and self-preservation can manifest itself in many unpleasant ways. We are not machines that can produce the same output day-in and day-out. We need to learn where to draw the line and start setting a few boundaries. If we don’t make the investment into our own mental, emotional, physical and spiritual well being, there will be no return.

It’s no mystery that there’s no magic pill or potion that can replace time spent on nurturing oneself. Remember, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. So lets try to juggle our hectic prearranged lifestyle into a more balanced act. It’s time for a “cool change”…

For every “yes” let there be a “no”. Stop trying to please everyone and start pleasing yourself. Strive for realistic deadlines. Don’t make a promise you can’t keep. Set attainable goals. Let go of expectations of yourself and others. Spend time in nature. Be true to yourself and more confidence and a greater sense of self will shine through.

So ask yourself, "Who’s life is it anyway?"

Photo by Samantha Hurley from Burst

Every Day's a Holly-Day! TKH